I stole it!

So Mike and I are on a mini vacation and I stole the computer to finally get to post. I have a couple of pictures that show ourselves before and after our diet. Mike looks so good! We have a free weekend to Bransen... Bransen you say, it may not sound so exciting but we did go see a great show our first night called the Duttons we noticed during their Christmas section they had scenes from movies we own. They are members and so nice! We hate half a carton of ice cream last night... I love butter pecan, and we added chocolate and toffee I haven't eaten that much ice cream in years and I loved every minute... the best part, I still feel as skinny as I did before I ate it! So back to our trip.... the shopping has been great. Mike only had 3 shirts that fit him and no pants to we finally bought him a few things so when he works.... he doesn't look sloppy now! Our lives have been... well normal for us lately, meaning they've been chaotic. I have so much to catch up on. I have a blog award I need to pass on, a store on ETSY to open, fundraising for my friend who is raising money for leukemia and lymphoma society.

Oh our camera was finally fixed... we seemingly, although it doesn't want to work if your zoom in, it's still completely blurry so I'll have to send it back in. And it a was all free! I'm so glad that I can actually take pictures of my family again! Of course I took some cute ones of Mike last night but I forgot my cord!

We leave today to get back home and see our cute daughter... yep this great weekend was all without Isabel, I do miss her but it's been so nice to get away for a couple of days and leave her with a super great friend. Mike and I have just gotten to talk, laugh and share in quiet moments with just the two of us. I love my husband so much and am grateful he came to this 'moral vegas' with me for our little weekend.


So here is our BEFORE picture from Last winter...



And the AFTER





and that's what a hundred pounds gone looks like!

one day

One day I'll have more time to update my blog again, one day we'll have two working computers again, one day this will serve as my journal entries again... until then... This is all I have time for, off to clean the church.. oh! and no pictures from Halloween our camera was sent into the shop because my little Belle princess broke it. One day....

CONTEST!

Here is a link to the contest that Courtney is hosting... I'm so excited!

http://princesscourtneysbarr.blogspot.com/2009/11/my-first-contest.html

Courtney pick me pick me!

why, why, why

Would it really be that hard for Heavenly Father to let just one good thing happen? Really, how many times can He help us get our hopes up just to let them crash back to the ground. I hate it when you really feel like you're doing everything you can to live your life correctly, trying so hard to listen and follow His plan and well...... NOTHING. I have no idea what else we can learn from all this, how many times we have to face the same crap and yet we're still supposed to be super happy go lucky... yeah it's crap. (not worries, I'm not losing my testimony, I'm just frustrated at life)

The wonder diet

In a nut shell, the HCG forces the body to utilize the stored body fat for energy so you burn fat that you don't want or need for your energy. It rids the body of toxins there by making you healthier. These drops also have other components in them to add ALL of your organs so they function at a higher capacity so again, not only are you healthier, with out toxins but your body is actually functioning at a higher capacity keeping you healthy. Many people are getting off their blood pressure meds, diabetes meds, etc. Please call me or email me if you need anymore info, I would write more but my husband needs my help moving a car right now! There are other drops out there but many of them can be synthetic and they quit working then you break out in hives... not pleasant. Also get the book "The weight loss cure" by Kevin Trudeau and it all makes sense.

Baking my way out.

The last month or so at our house has been a bit boring on the food side. Mike and I are both on this diet and he lost 35lbs in 40 days and now weighs less then he did when we were married. I have lost 11lbs in 14 days and have 6 left to go before I'm where I was when we were married. I love it but you don't get to eat much of any exciting food. Since we can't cook with oil, butter or sugar is limits what we can eat to an extent. Now I have a cookbook that follows the diet so I will have better luck.
However since I miss eating yummier foods I have taken to baking and giving the food away to friends. Isabel and I made snickerdoodles and I did not ONCE like my fingers or eat any dough. Those that lived with me in college know what a feat that is for me. The next day I went to Joann's craft/fabric store and bought mini personal sized bundt pans and make cakes, those also were given away, I did keep one for Isabel. The I went back to Joann's and bought these totally cute silicon bakeware that are muffin sized and each pan has three pumpkins and three leaves on it. So I can't wait to make rolls that shape, brownies, pumpkin harvest bread, baked alaska, so many great ideas! I've stopped cooking for a couple of days to give my neighbor time to eat his 2 dozen cookies and his 4 mini cakes (it's just him and his brother) then I think I'll make the harvest loaves. I'm loving this baking and can't wait until I can actually eat this stuff! I guess by the time I get to eat this not only will my body be able to handle the influx because of the drops I've been on but I should have mastered the homemade frosting/icing. I've never been good but I'm getting there now!

Mike gets to start normal eating on the 28th of Oct. I'm going to be closer to the middle of November but in time for Thanksgiving which I'm super exctied about!

Until then I'll keep baking my way out of this diet...

My life the last few weeks

Once again my life refuses to be dull and boring. Most of you know that I had a miscarriage a week ago, that was awful. Apparently my body does not like being pregnant for any real length of time. Hopefully we can find some way of fixing that. I was only 9 1/2 weeks along when I found out last Monday. I went in for a viability screening and 2 things were apparent the minute they started
1. There was no heart beat
2. the baby had not grown since my 7 week Ultrasound

so the MD on call talked briefly with me about my options but since I already had an appt to see my OB the next day I could talk it over in more detail with him. So I went home and 5 hrs later... well it all happened. And it sucked. The odd thing was I was completely fine with it Monday and Tuesday because lets face it, it was not as hard as what we dealt with September a year ago and of course I have a great testimony of eternal families so I didn't worry. Then Wednesday hit... My friend Lori from UT said it best... I had posted on my facebook that regardless of what I had said before today it was not ok. and Lori's response was ...
"I never believed you anyway".
Although I have 'recovered' from the rock bottom I have learned a few things. Heavenly Father trusts me way to much, I sometimes wish he'd love me a little less and they way I grieve makes people think that I get over things really fast when I don't. I've found that I put up walls that are invisible to everyone... including me. At odd times, they start to come crumbling down and I find myself trying to hold it up for some unknown reason.
I would however like to make a list of things NOT to say to people who lose children, whether by miscarriage, or pre-term or thru some accident.
1. You can always adopt. While that may be true it does not make people feel any better to hear it when they are going thru the chaos
2. You know you'll get to raise them/or see them again in the next life. Again this may be true but if someone like me doesn't know this by now they never will. When they are grieving, they know this but that does not mean that Heavenly Father doesn't expects me to be fine and not be sad. Sometimes I just want to be mad and sad for a bit.

However I realize that some people just don't know what to say but a simple "I'm sorry" is sufficient. They try to help you thru and figure they need to say something and often times they put their foot in their mouth and I need to be polite and just say.... thanks not "oh does that taste good?"

So my next list is my top two favorite things said to me last year when I was going thru a grieving process...
1. After her surgery on a Saturday we went to a reception for 30 min to say hello and we missed the sealing due to the surgery.. a nice lady who mean well put her arm around me and said... "so is your baby still alive?"

2. After our first day back at church after the funeral a lady came up to me and said.. "my dog died last year"
Really, really because I'm supposed to equate your dog with my child... OK

and recently I've heard the adoption thing a few times.
Again I know people try and most people thankfully don't know what it's like to go thru what I have. I truly don't wish this on my worst enemy.

So to end this rambling post... Thank you so much for the thoughts, and prayers and comments of support I really do appreciate all of the love we've received. So thank you if you actually got thru this whole rant. LOVE YOU ALL!